It has taken a few decades for me to learn the qualifications of a TRUE, authentic friend.
“Friends come and friends go. A true friend sticks by you like family.” Proverbs 18:24
I love people. There are many I consider to be friends. If you are reading this, I hope we can be friends! I am half YELLOW in temperament; and, yes, this IS a characteristic of a YELLOW temperament. The more friends I have, the better. However, it is possible to have a zillion friends without a real, true, loyal friend included in the bunch. Numbers don’t equate quality. I am thankful for – and blessed with – some TRUE friends in my life.
The telltale sign of a TRUE friend, regardless of temperament, is simple:
No strings attached…period.
TRUE friends will tell you what you look like in the dress, and if there is food in your teeth. They will defend you behind your back, and not gossip about you. They are available for you, as a high priority. HOWEVER, if they need to miss an important function of yours, you don’t hold it against them. They don’t hold grudges. They are prayer warriors.
Their love and loyalty is unconditional.
As Christians, we have friends who are sisters and brothers in the Lord. These are bonds that will remain through eternity. I am so thankful for them.
My younger sister is a true friend.
My childhood next door neighbor, since we were three years old, is a true friend. A lifetime has passed. We can go months and never speak; yet, I trust her with my life.
I have another true best friend I met at a Bible study when we had babies. We are still in constant contact, weekly, to make sure everything is okay with each other. Yet, our friendship is not conditional to our talking.
Another of my true friends is more a ‘sister friend.’ (She lived with us, and was adopted into our family, when she came home from college with my sister – and, stayed.) She would fly across the country if I needed her.
I have a true friend who is far away, a prayer warrior, whom I would call 24/7 if needed.
None of the women listed above would lie to me or run off with my husband. Their friendship isn’t contingent on how often we talk or if we miss each other’s birthdays.
Politics doesn’t play a part in our friendship. We all have different interests, personalities, temperaments and lifestyles. When feelings are accidently hurt, it doesn’t put a glitch in our relationships.
I’m fortunate to have a true friend in my husband as well. I am truly blessed and thankful.
A quick TEMPERAMENT overview for some “friend” insight:
YELLOWS need people in their lives, so they consider most everyone a friend. YELLOW children tend to be overly naïve and trusting when it comes to friendships.
REDS do not need a ton of friends. They are self sufficient and quite comfortable with one or two true friends. REDS, usually, have a discerning antenna to know a true friend when they meet one. RED children are the ones in charge of their friends.
BLUES are the most loyal friends, yet also require only a few true friends as they go through life. BLUES are sometimes overly trusting and may be “taken in” or “duped” by those who call themselves friends, but prove otherwise down the road. BLUE children are so trustworthy, themselves. They are disappointed to discover the masses don’t necessarily follow their lead.
GREENS have many friends. As a rule, they don’t initiate friendships. People just gravitate toward them; because, they are the nicest people in the world. GREEN children are also nice to everyone, but hesitant to make friends on their own.
You are so blessed if you have TRUE friends. Be especially thankful for them this Thanksgiving season!